Thoughts
by lupin and black
Summary: Concerning Winchesters. A drabble series of What If
1. Promises

Thoughts

A/N so this is not Bed but it is something… it's short but I just really missed the Winchesters so there is this….. there might be more of this later maybe…

**Promises**

Dean never made promises he didn't intend to keep. Even when they where young. He never offered the silly promises older brothers told their younger brothers for comforter. Never promised it would be okay when he knew it wouldn't. When Dean made a promise it was with more than his mouth. He would never promise anything he knew he could not keep. When Dean said he would never leave Sam he meant it. When he said he would do anything for Sam he meant it with everything in him. Dean would fight bleed and die shattered before he let Sam go first. Dean never asked if Sam wanted it that way. It never mattered if Sam wanted it. When Sam was younger he always thought it was slightly selfish of Dean. He got older a bit lost and left the game. He came back harder, stronger, a bit broken. Now he knows things. Things he never realized before. He would fight bleed and die screaming before he let Dean leave him voluntary or not. So it seems the only way either of them is leave the game is together.


	2. Water

Water

John

When Sam was very little, 2 almost three he developed a terrifying unfounded fear of water. He refused to go out in the rain, ran screaming from a glass of water and would forgo bath time unless Dean took a bath with him. Dean at the wise old age of six found this to be a petty aggravation. John has fond memories of watching his small boys battle out the logiest of bath time. Who got the ducky and for how long, if the ship came in before or after bubbles. The fights could go on for the hours before and after dinner, right up till John dumped them both naked and squealing in to the bath.

Sometime during the summer of Sam's third year after a few months spent on the sandy beaches of Florida chasing after Dean, Sam's fear of water vanished as swiftly and subtle as it had arrived. Bath time was restored to a privet affair much less grumbling to be had on both sides.


	3. Blockbuster

Blockbuster

John

John was pretty sure he had the most Blockbuster accounts in the history of Blockbuster. Of course the staff at the local Blockbuster didn't know this. The tall, skinny, pimple face boy behind the counter gave John a choked horrible smile and hands John his 26th blockbuster card. Dean went throw movies the way Sam went throw books. He gave the kid a returning grimace and went in search of his boys. Finding Dean in a video store could be as hard as hunting a vengeful ghost. He found Sam sitting on the floor in the kid section, small face titled towards the TV as he watching Barney move across the screen. He bent down and lifted the boy up. Sam eyes moved from the screen to his dad's face. The frown dropped away, melting into a smile. John smiled back. Sam slipped his arms around John's shoulder, resting his head on his arm. He was 8 getting too big to be hauled around. Ever now and than John let himself break and he carried him around anyway.

He found Dean in the horror section fighting with a willowy girl about the accuracy of slasher flicks. She was pretty in a hunger way, her mouth set in a slight tilt upward, her big brown eyes focused on Dean's face. Dean looked away from her his eyes settled on John, his face broke out into his sunshine and beam smile. It was easy to do this, carry Sam warped around him, help Dean pick out movies.

The world had been quite for two weeks, no missions, no memos, no trail to hunt. A week of silence put John on edge. Two weeks was driving him crazy. He awoke this morning angry. He stayed in bed till he knew the boys would be gone. He called in sick to the part time job he had at a garage further into the shabby town. He spent the day on the sofa watching mind numbing daytime TV. Sam came home smiling. He crawled into John lap and showed him his report card straight A's. Dean smirked as he handed John his report card, straight C's. John had long suspected Dean got the lowest passing grade on purpose. In another life John would have sent him to the school councilor. In the hear and now he smirked back eyebrow arched and let Dean pick up two boxes of cookies when they went to the supermarket. He didn't need grades to prove to him Dean was smart he knew that already, he'd seen Dean at work.

He hung up Sammy report card on the refrigerator and let him pick what was going on the pizza. He sat and listen to Sammy go on about how well Dean played in the after school soccer game and how he promised to show Sam how to play right. John asked Dean why he didn't join the school team. Dean shrugged eyes focused on Sammy. A deep feeling of guilt grasped and tug in John's gut. He tug a bit on Dean's sun kissed hair and offered to go out and get a blockbuster card. Dean smirked up at him eyes bright and shockingly beautiful, he looked a lot like his mother. John knew tomorrow or the next day he would pick up a trial and they would have to pack up and get moving or worst yet he would have to leave them behind and go hunting. He hate that worst than the moving. Leaving them behind felt to much like it was for good.

For now he was in the local Blockbuster following Dean up to the cash register. Sammy perched on his hip, a bag of candy grasped in his hand, big hazel eyes watching John in that trusting open way he usually reserve for Dean. He chewed on his lower lip while John tried to explain to him why some other kids might actually like a man dressed in a big purple suite. He laughed at Sam confused expression. Sammy frowned for all of two seconds before breaking into his own version of the sunshine and beam smile. John silently thanked the man above for at lest leaving him this.


	4. TV

TV

Dean

Dean could never understand why Sammy could never just sit down and watch TV. He could watch a movie from start to finish but a 30 to 60 minute show was beyond him. When Dean was old enough to contemplate it, he first considered the addition of commercials, than the fact that you had to watch on a semiweekly bases. In the end he chalked it up to the nonexistent of TV the first three years of Sammy life.


	5. Hair

Hair

Sam

Sam had always been fascinated by Dean's hair. It always seemed to gleam and shimmer even when there was no sunlight. He was shocked to see Dean after two years of not seeing Dean with his hair chopped short. From the age 13 on ward Dean had always worn his hair some degree of long. For a time at 16 his hair was more than half way down his back. It took all of 15 and most of 16 to get it there. During a hunt it tripped him up, almost got him shot.

Afterwards when it was all done, body dusted evident burned, it surprised Sam that dad didn't yell at Dean. Just softly ask him to chop some of it off. Dean complied.

Sam came home from school two days later to find Dean sitting in a chair in the kitchen, John hand working a pair of sharp sliver scissors in Dean's hair. On Dean's instructions John was shaping a sharp bob that curled under Dean's chin. Sam dumped his bag on the floor and sat in the chair opposite Dean. He watched the scissors chop away clumps of Dean's hair. They drifted to the floor landed in a patch of gleaming late afternoon sunlight, bright blond bundles of soft hair. Dean felt Sam eyes on him he tilted his head just enough to make a face. Sam rolled his eyes. Dean stuck out his tongue, Sam wrinkled up his nose at him.

When Dad was done he brushed off Dean's back. Sam sat back in his seat and watched Dean shake his head like a big dog. Dad cleared his throat and told Dean to pick up the hair. Sam offered to help. He gathers the soft hair and helped Dean toss it in the garbage. He kept a few locks, stuffing them in the deep pocket of his worn denim shorts. Later he would stick them between the pages of the black book he keeps his thoughts in, next to the worn picture of mom Dean had give him so long ago he doesn't really remember when.

By the time dad comes back bearing pizza and soda the kitchen floor is clean. He gives Sam a worn smile and runs a hand throw Dean's hair.

Dad never asked Dean to cut his hair short. It reminded him of mom's hair. Sam didn't need dad to tell him that he'd seen the pictures.


	6. Motel Hotel

Motel Hotel

Dean

In between the broken down cheap apartments and the shabby one level houses there had always been motels and hotels. When Dean was younger he never notices the different between a motel and hotel. When he reached the wise age of 8 he realized they left mints on your pillow in hotels. He realized this soon enough to notice the decline in mints on his pillow.


	7. Trinkets

A/N Okay this is the end of this Fic. I like doing these drabble style fics so look out 4 more Supernatural drabble style fics. This was one of the easiest fic 4 me to write. It's been very kool.  
Review good or bad always welcomed.  
Peace

Trinkets

Sam had never been one to like jewelry. The only piece of jewelry John wore was his wedding ring. Dean was the flashy one. He priced his ear at 12 took it out at 13 put it back at 15 adding another hole for the hell of it. He bought necklaces and bracelets at flee markets, scrounge street fairs for rings. He painted his nails a startling sliver for all of the year 16 and considered getting his lip pierced. John rallied against the piercing and in the end Dean decided against it.

When Dean was 17 Sam surprised him on a nothing ugly day in late fall with a plain sliver ring. Dean smiled made up for the over cast sun. He slapped Sam on the back and let his little brother cling to him for a moment. He slipped the sliver ring on his right hand ring finger, it's been on ever since.

When Dean was 19 after a mission went belly up mostly because John had under esteemed the ghost and Dean was hurt in the process. John surprised him the next night with an Egyptian protection ward on a thick string. He helped Dean put it on and gave his son hair a gentle tug. Dean beamed up at him, John cleared his throat and left the room.

When Dean woke up in a hospital bed the first thing he does is cheek for his jewelry. This time was no different. He sat up and winced glancing down at his hand to see the pale swap of skin where the ring should have been. He touched his neck to find it empty. He was getting ready to climb out of the bed when the door opened. Sam walked in a tight smile on his face, a clear bag clinched in his hand. Dean leaned back into the pillows, Sam dropped the bag on his stomach. His fingers where to numb to be of much use. He pulled a face trying to wiggle his fingers. Sam snatched the bag back. Slipped the ring on Dean's finger, Sam shifted to the side and helping Dean put on the necklace. They sat for a while in silences Dean could still feel the hum of something moving throw him. The door opened a tall black man walked in, a clinical smile on his face. Sam excused himself the doctor open his mouth and started talking.


End file.
